1.09.2010

Bend Over Shorty (Awards)!



The Shorty Awards are the best reason ever to throw your laptop out the window of your fourth story apartment, hopefully reaching the adjacent building and taking out an aspiring David Archuleta.

Maybe you don't know what the Shorty Awards are. That makes two of us. Briefly, which is all the time I can bother to waste learning about this farce, the Shorty Awards recognize the best Twat of the year. The Twats are nominated by category.

Above, you'll notice that David Archuleta, karaoke singer, is in the Top 10 of nominees in three different categories: Health, Food, Education.

This means two things: first, Twats have a good sense of humor and think the prospect of an Archuleta sweep is as funny as I do. It also means that every second someone thinks seriously about who deserves a Shorty Award, they are doing nothing other than contributing to the heat death of the universe (at best), or keeping jobless, health insurance-less, child veterans on the streets in winter (at worst).

I can't wait to hear about the winners!

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